"My Anniversary"

Hi everyone,

My wedding anniversary was few weeks ago (December 20th), this year was my 33rd anniversary. I had pretty high hopes for this day. Since my kids are older, a couple of them are even married and on their own (meaning making good money), I was hoping for a grand celebration. Since I knew all my kids would be home for winter break, I started working on them ahead of time. In a subtle way I would bring up my anniversary, and I would also claim that I am depressed, feel very old and have no life, hoping at least one of them would get the hint.

My kids started coming home on December 18th and by late night 19th, every single one was home. Interestingly enough, no one was mentioning my anniversary. I thought for sure this year it's going to be a surprise party.

Next morning I got up earlier than usual, cleaned my kitchen and while everyone was still sleeping, took a long shower, beautified myself (which by the way takes much longer than before), wore fancy clothes and sat pretty while waiting for everyone to wake up. I don't like to be caught off guard by any surprise, let alone a surprise party. In my mind I was ready for all kind of PAPARAZZI SHOTS.

Now I will tell you how my day went.............

10am......Anwar(my husband) got up, came downstairs, looked at me, and did not even notice how exceptionally good I looked for 10 in the morning and went for a walk.

11am.......Haroon (my son) walked in the kitchen, complained about his baby crying most of the night, and since he went to sleep late, overslept and missed his Fajr namaz. Then he looked at my outrageous HULIYA, and asked if I was going anywhere. I had no answer for him. I think he was sleepwalking because he did not even wait for any response. He went back to his room to get his beauty sleep. I felt so embarassed that I ran upstairs and changed into my SUPER MOM clothes.

12pm.........Everyone was up by now. Kids, grandkids, son-in law and daughter-in-law, all looking for ACTION (in Chaudhryland meaning FOOD). Aalia wanted scrambled eggs, Rabya

wanted pancakes, Haroon started eating cereal and Hashim put his head in the fridge to inhale the leftovers. I almost lost it when Aalia said, "Mother could you please make Shahnoor egg and toast while I go change the baby's diaper." I wanted to throw the frying pan at somebody, at that point, anybody's head, but I kept my cool thinking the day is still young and they still might have something up their sleeve for me.

Well my friends, the day turned into evening, evening turned into night and nothing happened. Actually something did happen, I somehow ended sitting for my grandkids as ALL MY CHILDREN went to the movies. At midnight I went to bed and can you believe, I was still hopeful because I looked under my bed twice for a "Chip 'n' Dale" surprise.

By the next morning, I became quite vindictive. I don't get mad, I get even. I took my husband's credit card, went to the Short Hills Mall and bought the most expensive thing I could find. I then decided to order another Nomi Ansari outfit and called it a day.

When I came back, I looked so content, serene, and somehow pulled off looking innocent on top of that. When Anwar saw me happy he became insecure. I think the reason husbands panic when they see their wives happy is because deep down they know they have nothing to do with it......actually they are quite sure of it. He had to ask "ki gal hay bari khush lug rai hain?" I replied "I feel so lucky to have six beautiful children and a wonderful husband like you. What did I ever do to deserve this?" (no seriously, what did I ever do to deserve all that?). He totally believed me, became very happy, and stayed happy until he got his next credit card bill.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO ME!

Much love, Shehla